Hey folks, got a longer piece for you here. I’ve been posting more to my substack, so check that out if you wanna. Some reposts of older stuff and such. Trying to get to 50 subs! Looking good so far. I’ll leave a link here: Substack. Without further ado…
And So I Watched The Stars Go Out
I thought myself at once some forlorn Knight Errant, one whose dreams of far-flung places and ancient treasures were lost to the excruciating romance of being just above mediocrity. I believed for so long in a world driven by the fantasy of it all, lost in my own and others’ designs. I flailed at the thought of never living, and found myself destroyed more-so by the idea of an un-living and inevitable death.
Where then was the adventure that my child mind had promised me? Where then were the lands of green and gold, lands untouched and unbound by those now-thoughts of index funds, and taxes, and real, unreal relationships. I am burdened by these thoughts of unbidden uncertainty that cloud my mind and keep me from my place among the stars.
Do you feel now that we as a generation are less strong, less capable? Am I lost because I am weak? Uncertain and unclear because I am less resilient? Is not the world harder to be a part of than it ever was in times before?
I find myself drifting in and out of sleep. I wish for a world where things are not easy, but more possible. I wish not to face the accumulation of decades of falsehoods and failures that came before and instead be evaluated by the strength of my character, and boldness of my intellect. I dreamt once of a world that was governed by laws and dreams alike, a world my parents told me was and could be.
That world seems to have gone, forever changed into the nightmare of now. I wish not for the same, but better and evermore, forevermore. I wished upon a star that came, asking after a life they said would come.
And so I watched the stars go out, one little twinkle, and then another…
Poems by Sam 